Relationships Archive

If you consult astrology when dating, I can’t take you seriously

As a kid in the 1980s, I had a large, hardcover book called Stars & Planets that offers a foundational understanding of our solar system and the universe. The book taught me, among other things, about red dwarves and black holes; the relative size of moons to their planets and how oxygen and gravity work. It drove home how infinitesimally small my humanity is in …

When a Lifelong Scrub (Finally) Gets the Girls

In the early spring of 2016, I went out on a few dates with a woman named Jessica* whom I’d met on Match. Jessica hit all the marks on the Jack & Jill checklist: preternaturally attractive, high-paying corporate gig, a condo in the South Loop (Chicago’s Mecca for well-heeled, bougie black folks); a fit frame, keen sartorial sensibilities and at least one NBA player on …